Our new life

We have officially been "on the road" for about a month.

Technically that is a misnomer. We left Michigan on November 8, and drove like crazy people to arrive at our daughter's home five days later in order to babysit while they took a mini-vacation. We almost made it in four days, but strong winds in Arizona forced us to hunker-down early to wait out the wind. There is little worse than pulling a swaying trailer through mountain passes.

We have been staying at our daughter's home off and on since arriving and will continue to do so until shortly after the holidays or until our son-in-law runs screaming from the house, whichever comes first. The two of them have a lot of holiday parties, farewell parties for co-workers, and work conferences between now and the new year. We are needed and it has been enjoyable to do "grandparent duty" for them. But it is a fine line between helping out and "over-staying your welcome," as my mother used to say.

Flexibility is one of the joys of having no hard and fast plans, but it is also something we have to get used to. Or at least I have to get used to it. King keeps himself busy by working on all kinds of projects at our daughter's house. Some of them she asked him to do, others he found on his own. I'm not certain if she really wanted them done or is just too polite to ask him: "What the heck did you do now?" I know that is the way I was with my father.  So many times I wanted to say, "Thanks Dad but I really had different plans for the breezeway (or whatever)." My father had a difficult time with our project timetables, which generally were based on bills, golf outings and paychecks -- meaning projects would be started, bills would come up or an all-important golf scramble was scheduled and project completion would be pushed back months.

As I write this I am watching our daughter and King put together a lighted "Happy Holidays" sign to place on her garage roof. I THINK it is the last of the outdoor Christmas decorations.

I enjoy watching the two of them work together. Our daughter has grandiose ideas which she patiently explains to her father over and over again until that one "ah ha" moment when he finally "gets it." He really is not that obtuse, he just has problems conceptualizing abstract ideas. Where I will throw up my hands in absolute frustration while trying to explain something to him, our daughter will keep trying until her ideas come across. Of course it helps that they have not been married 42 years and that daughters and daddies tend to have more patience with one another than husbands and wives.

I have enjoyed being a part of holiday traditions in a new home. Our daughter has taken a mix of the traditions she grew up with and blended them with the traditions of her husband.  We spent two weekends ago shopping for a Christmas tree and decorating the outside of the house with lights that would rival the Griswolds from the movie "Christmas Vacation." This past weekend the tree has finally been decorated and Sunday night was the last night for lighting candles on the Menorah. They have been teaching the boys about reason, self-esteem, courage, freedom, love, loyalty, generosity and hope. I hope the traditions they are starting now are something their boys will continue when they are grown.

Back "home" in Michigan our sons have blended our family traditions with those of their wives. It has been enjoyable to watch this -- the give and take and working to make things work to create new family traditions -- traditions that I hope will become ingrained only to change again when the grandchildren become adults. My daughter and I were discussing this the other day. She was surprised to learn that some of the Christmas traditions we followed as she was growing up were a combination of Stehower and McCrossin traditions. Some were our own invention.

Wishing everyone a blessed holiday season and may your traditions bring you comfort and joy. Best wishes for a great New Year.